Garlic's Food Clinic

Dear All,

It's Dave here, and I'm presenting our 2006 report. I'd like to say a particular "hello" to anyone who doesn't really know us, and couldn't care less what we've been doing. Don't worry - we'll send you another report next year. Anyway, what a year it's been...

First of all, I'd like to be the first to wish everyone a very Merry Christmas. If you're preparing to celebrate that great holiday with the giving of gifts, you might like to consider that if pointless mass market tatt and nick-nacks didn't exist, we'd probably have invented them.

Dinky hit the top of the charts in seventeen countries in November with his re-release of The Look of Love by ABC. He even managed to dislodge the Scorpions' Wind of Change in Germany, which had been number one there since 1991. (It has since returned to the top.) Sadly, the royalties deal we signed was terrible, so not much to show for it.

On the science side, Hugo devised an equation of the form y = ax + b that explains all phenomena in the physical universe. He is now planning to spend more time gardening and with his philanthropic projects (which of course he never utters a word about).

That pretty much wraps up this year's round-up. I've not been up to much myself. There's only the twisted ankle I got chasing that cat for its photo. I would like to comment on this blog, though. Here at GFC, we've always been among the first to embrace new technology. I've got a SONY WALKMAN and a dot-matrix printer, and we adopted the steam engine before even the Romans had them. Still, the lack of a digital cameras is a shortcoming. If we had one, we could show you even more of just how well the kids have been doing at school, my championship winning rally car and the new GFC foundation centre for disadvantaged children. (I did have one of those disposable cameras from Boots, but I broke it trying to get the ill-fated cat photo.)

Anyway - I've got to go and shovel some more coal into the generator. Hear from you soon, I hope.

D.A.

(Hope that was obnoxious enough for you.)